If you are sitting in chair number one, you will pay $9 at the Venetian for a beer. If you are sitting in chair number two, your drink will be free. The chairs might even be positioned side by side and the difference in your bar tab will be the same. Why? If you’ve ever been to a casino you know the answer already and I apologize for the “duh” factor in this blog. Chair number two is a slot machine chair.

I learned this very important lesson within fifteen minutes of being in Vegas. I was exhausted from traveling all day by the time we checked in at the Excalibur. I plopped down at the bar and ordered a Diet Coke. Note to Diet Coke lovers, don’t stay at the Excalibur; they only have Pepsi products. Normally, I will forgo a diet Pepsi, but being that we were in Vegas I needed caffeine so I settled. The 6oz Pepsi cost me $4.

During our first hand of blackjack, this lady paid us a visit:

She brought me all the diet Pepsi I wanted FOR FREE. I was spitting distance away from my chair earlier at the bar.

Vegas is all about odds: the casino’s odds. You are there to lose BIG TIME. I have to admire the way they play the odds in their favor. If I’m at the bar NOT losing my money, they bend me over and spank me for diet Pepsi. If I’m at a slot machine, they pump me full of booze so I keep pumping the machine with money. There are no chairs on the casino floor to relax in without a slot machine or Keno game in your face. There is no internet connection in the room – only on the casino floor (where you pay $13.99 a visit.)

*SPANKED*

But to all future Vegas friends… You CAN beat the system.

Where did I sit and sip all the diet Pepsi I wanted for FREE? Right here…

If you just feel the need to sit at a BAR and drink then go find O’Shaes on the corner of LVBLVD and Flamingo. After spending the day wandering from casino to casino we needed to chill out and relax. As previously stated, there is no place to just relax in Sin City but we saw a sign that said “$2 Miller Lite on Draft” and decided to give it the benefit of the doubt. The best description I can give O’Shaes would be an Irish frat house casino complete with greasy food and beer pong. Maybe relaxation wasn’t accomplished but we were certainly entertained.

After draining a couple of beers and winning five bucks on video poker the door behind the bar opened and closed as if a ghost had entered the bar. The BF was telling me a story (I don’t even remember what it was) when this guy climbed a ladder and was on top of the bar:

Only in Vegas can you get a shot poured down your throat by a Leprechaun. If anyone knows where I can hire a little person for a while, please let me know. My man wants to hang out with one on St. Patty’s Day!